Life

2017 has been a wild ride so far.  Our crazed president pushes the boundaries of sanity on a daily basis, and still, there is no outrage calling for his immediate ouster.

How can this be 2017 America?  The rich don't just keep getting richer, they hope to annihilate the poor and struggling masses by removing health care, scrapping any oversight of the financial giants providing them unfettered freedom from the government regulations enacted to keep them honest and ethical.  Just this week the health secretary was replaced because he declared gun violence a threat to public safety, a stance not favored by the NRA and therefore our puppet president.

The swamp is quickly drowning out any trace that we are a nation guided by that esteemed document, the U.S. Constitution.  Lies, corruption and outright evil have taken its place.  No more is there a slight memory of the "do the right thing" mentality.  Pollution controls, protections of public land and providing a safety net for the disadvantaged citizens in our society have all been replaced with conflicts of interest, enrichment of the richest and deportation of those individuals that are a symbol of the ideals this country was built on.  Opportunity for all and a guarantee that with hard work and determination, a successful, happy, healthful life was within reach of all.

This is how a dictatorship begins.  Squelching your critics, creating chaos on a daily basis, and recruiting your friends and business associates to surround you in your bubble.  Any dissenting opinionator is promptly dumped out on his/her ass.  Trump resembles Putin and Kim Jung Un infinitely more than any prior U.S. President.  God help us all to survive his presidency without a world wide nuclear catastrophe.

Sundance 2017

Another Sundance under my belt, and this time it was a shared affair with a long time gal pal, and fellow film enthusiast. Truncated to a four day weekend, including two days consumed by the 465 mile drive from Helena, we nonetheless squeezed in Wilson on Friday night after collecting our festival passes and film tickets. The 80 mph speed limit and bare roads enabled efficient travel, complemented by good conversation and a batch of newly downloaded podcasts.  Aided by carefully chosen snacks, we reduced our stops to the bare minimum of required rest areas.  We spent Saturday and Sunday focused on our films, three each day, but managed to intersperse a quick shopping excursion for undergarments, and stops at a pair of local microbreweries sampling the smartly named, hop heavy, craft brews and companion grub. A total of seven films in all, we easily could have taken in more of the many buzz-worthy flicks, had time and money allowed a more extensive trip. 

Mostly strong, we viewed some very memorable films among our choreographed weekend selections, which we deemed a success by the time we wrapped and headed home. The standouts included the often funny and entertaining Wilson, with Woody Harrelson and Laura Dern; 78/52 the Hitchcock Psycho shower scene documentary; and Call Me By Your Name, the tale of a moderately heartwrenching Italian summer romance with Armie Hammer.  Shirley MacLaine as a cantakerous "difficult woman" directing the final edit on her own obituary in The Last Word and The New Radicals which begs the question at what point does a personal rights/freedom/privacy advocate cross the line and morph into a terrorist, both stood on their own merit as well.

Sadly, Where Is Kyra fell on its face due to a heavy handed treatment of the homeless epidemic in America.  The film managed to portray an unsympathetic character as the poster girl for a very serious issue in America, and failed to either provoke a deeper understanding of, or provide any viable solution to the problem.  An overwrought sound track, similar to fingernails scratching a blackboard each time our main character waded into questionable moral territory, made it close to unwatchable.  Treating audience members as idiots, who need to be clubbed over the head to see a point, casts a dark shadow onto the director, those watching, and the subject matter in general.  Michelle Pfeiffer and Kiefer Sutherland are wasted in this film.

Of course in the midst of this movielicious weekend occurred the epic Australian Open final between Rafa Nadal and Roger Federer, meeting for the first time in a grand slam final since 2011.  Long time rivals and great friends, it was a match for the ages which no one in the world of tennis, neither talking heads nor hard core fans, ever anticipated.  Another mind-blowing 5-setter, naturally, Roger prevailed in the end, but both played their hearts out with peak performances of exquisite proportions. 

I thank the tennis gods for bestowing the fans with one last (??) monumental match between these two greats.  Alas, even as I continue to root, as always, for Rafa, it was clearly a win-win for both of them, replicating the skills evident at the height of their careers.  No sane person thought such a match possible as Rafa and Roger edge near the sunset of their professional careers.  Bravo...and on to the next tournament!

 

2017

It's finally here.  A fresh new year.  A clean slate.  So full of promise, yet still dragging all the oversized baggage of 2016 like a ball and chain.  A ginormous ball, with a massive chain.  No matter, we can still face the new year with bright eyes and an optimistic attitude.  It's our survivalist, buoyant nature to expect great things along with our never ending faith in the innate goodness of humankind.  A true testament, yet against all obvious evidence to the contrary.

Still, we soldier on.  See the goodness in every day and each, or nearly each, person we encounter.  Never before has a year shoved the fact of our mortality so vividly in our faces.  Yet with that realization comes understanding and wisdom.  And acceptance.  In the end, we can only love each other and express that love, openly and without boundaries.  A life without regrets for the things left unsaid is a life well lived.  A life lived honestly and as true to ourselves and others as possible, along with self-reflection of the motives for each action we take, deliberate or otherwise, culminates into a fulfilling life filled with calm confidence.

My wish for 2017 is to continue to thrive and learn and elevate my thoughts and actions and be a positive force in the lives of those I come in contact with each day, however briefly.  For the world at large, I wish for knowledge, truth, wisdom, understanding and acceptance.  And a generous supply of joy.  Happy New Year.

The Silver Lining

There is an upside to all this mayhem named Trump.  It starts with each American digging deep down in their psyche and questioning how they live their life and whether it's time for a change.  All the protesting and whining in the world will not overcome the fact that enough registered voters made the effort to vote for Trump to make him president.  Popular vote be damned, it's Déjà Vu all over again and we didn't even require a supreme court debacle this time around.  And to the grand masses, the 47% of registered voters who didn't bother to show up, or those who made their little squeak of protest by voting for a third party candidate, I say, you get what you deserve.

The system is broken, but it has been for a very long time.  Trump is a symptom, not the cause.  So many factors accumulated into this perfect storm and each and every individual contributed.  The spineless women who kept quiet when Trump groped them in hopes of furthering their careers, or were just not brave enough to stand up for what is right.  The democratic party machine that derailed Bernie in favor of greasing the skids for Hillary, when it seemed apparent to me, he was on track to bump Trump out of the ring on the final showdown.  To the GOP who looked like the Keystone Cops playing both sides of the fence who opened up a clear path for Trump to march right down.  If Cruz and Rubio and a third rate Bush were all you could come up with, it's no wonder Americans backed a bloviating, egomaniac who vocalized their pain and frustration.

To the Hillary camp, who it turns out ignored Bill Clinton's advice to pay heed to the suffering blue collar rust belt states, that may have been your one fatal move which could have changed the outcome.  Instead, her camp simply conceded defeat in those areas by ignoring them.  It is a well known fact that Bill Clinton knows how to energize the masses and get elected to the highest office in the land, twice.  By choosing to do it "her way" Hillary sealed her own fate.  She made no effort to inspire or ignite a spark during her appearances and set her campaign on cruise control, choosing to believe there was no way the majority of voters would choose a clown with no political experience as our president.

I was looking forward to the team of two Clintons in the white house; they are both super smart and experienced.  But the baggage broke their backs, and it turns out while his appeal remains in the stratosphere, hers is mired in muck.

The upside, for those who choose some introspection, is to mobilize for your beliefs.  Act locally and reach beyond your own interests investing time and effort in the betterment of your community.  Protesting the outcome of the election is a futile waste of time, just as spending $5 million on an obscenely decadent ring instead of donating to worthy causes which benefit humanity is a crime of ego.  We are a nation of spoiled brats, blaming others for our misfortune, lying and failing to do the right thing in favor of our own personal gain.  And now, we have elevated a crazed psychopath to lead our nation.  Is it really any wonder?

The Emperor Has No Brain, and a Heart of Darkness

Many Americans are so blinded by their hate for Hillary Clinton, they are willing to choose as their president a man who has no regard for anyone, man or especially woman, beyond his own demented interests.  He has been gaming the system his whole life, including bankruptcies and subsequent bailouts for failed ventures, screwing contractors out of payments and escaping the average soul's due of paying taxes.  In his spare time he bulldozed his way "Bill Cosby" style through myriad of women he came in contact with, often by specific design such as Master of the Miss Universe Pageant.  Throwing his weight around, he boldly felt his way around as many as he could get his hands on.  And just like Bill Cosby's victims, he knew with his status, none would utter a word, publicly at least, lest they subject themselves to the usual name calling and blame the victim accusations. 

The party of "family values" would apparently look the other way if their wives or daughters were manhandled by someone of high status for fear of falling out of favor or missing out on a plum business deal.

Many of these women were groped, and worse, in a time when women were still putting up with much, much more than they, hopefully, would today.  If a man put his hand up my skirt in a bar or on a plane, my first reaction would be to slap or punch him, then declare it to those around me rather than shamefully recede into the background or run away.  I know people are sheep and hate to "get involved" but I have enough faith in humanity to think that if the man in the first class cabin who witnessed Trump's disgusting, brazen behavior saw the same thing nowadays, he'd say "what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

Those still backing Trump for president are in dire need of an antidote to wake them from their stupor.  He appeals to the lowest possible denominator of his supporters, the racist, misogynistic, narcissistic traits they now feel fully comfortable wearing as a badge of honor and patriotism.  Today they are wallowing in the glory of their most uneducated, hateful, ignorant selves. 

The mob mentality of "Hillary for Prison" simply because they can't stand the thought of a woman as president is a frightful commentary of just how far we've progressed as a society.  Your true colors are showing folks, and they're not pretty.

My underlying hope is that every woman who's ever been objectified, violated, groped, patronized, or much worse, which by the way includes each and every one of us, will rise up in full force and shout, in no uncertain terms, this man is unfit to serve our country and declare an oath to uphold the U.S. Constitution.  The hate and insanity may be contagious, but they are also personal choices.

The Bright Lights of New York

Timid Men (Who Misrepresent Themselves)

The ad read:

Mission Impossible - m4w (Helena)

height : 6'2" (187cm)
status : single

age: 57

57 Montana professional / classical music fan seeks 40+ woman for travel, hiking and romantic companion. Described by friends as "Intelligent. Creative. Ruggedly handsome." Please have passport and desire to see and share Europe.

 

A more truthful ad would have read:

"Arm candy with a current passport and half a brain wanted for travel adventures.  If strangers frequently mistake you for a model, the brain requirement may be waived.  All expenses paid on a per hour or per trip basis, per a mutually agreed upon contract."


Don't pretend to be a naive man, unaware of the treachery and fakery of the web.  You have not been hiding out like a fugitive in a cave for the last 20 years.  Your feigned shock and awe upon reading the XXX responses along with the offers for paid services and requests for your credit card number is not accepted.  Even self described "nice guys" troll the web for porn, photos of naked, surgically enhanced boobs and whatever other twisted kinky shit they may be into.

The timid men, afraid to dip a toe in the unfamiliar online dating pool, "mommy the water is too cold!" have no place online.  The world is a dangerous place and the web is a hungry alligator, lying in wait to snatch you in one foot of water at a Disney resort. 

If you live frozen with paranoia, your life becomes a mundane, dismal existence, void of all love, adventure and the unexpected joyful surprises that come with taking the occasional risk.

Go ahead, climb the ladder to the diving board and plunge into the deep end of the pool.  As long as you know how to swim, it will all work out okay.

Footnote: contrary to modern folklore, age is not "just a number" except for men past a certain age who are freaking out about getting older.  For women, it is the most important factor by which they are judged and scrutinized.

"Nursed Me" (All Night Long)

The Adventure Begins

I have never been a waitress, never held a position in the hospitality industry, unless you count a semester of misery at McDonald's during my short stint at Moscow, Idaho in the fall of 1977. But here I am, all signed up to be an UBER driver, launching exactly a week from today in my Montana town.

The intake crowd hanging at the airstream trailer in the Wal-Mart parking lot were hipper than hip, not locals, I correctly surmised, but here from Seattle.  I was an eager inquisitor, asking all the right questions.  Contract worker? Where's the contract?  Oh, you already signed that under the terms and conditions!  OH, OF COURSE I DID, haha.  And the tutorial on the app?  Of course I want the demo with the cutie named Alex.  And the 20% cut UBER takes? Oh, correction my dear, it's actually 25%!  But no matter, I'm as enthused as I can be, my own boss, my crisp, barely used 2014 Civic is newly vacuumed and ready for launch day.  

Yes, Alex reported, I am all set, license, registration, proof of insurance, and good news "you passed the background check!"  Things were pretty slow when I showed up, but alas, I was assured that earlier, at the 10:00 start time, they were quite busy.  Exactly why I waited until later, of course.  

We shall see.  My first few trips will be nerve wracking I'm sure, but I will power on and forge my way into the field of paid public service.  My expectations are tempered, as real life has a way of dominating any get rich quick scheme.  I will give it an honest effort, see if the payoff is worth the extra miles, the wear and tear on my little Civic, and the drunken bar patrons needing a ride home at 2:00 AM.  Dear God, let no one puke in my little car!

An Evening With Friends

Broadway tunes are not my thing, rather something to suffer through, but spending an evening with friends, eating yummy food, drinking well executed beverages, was well worth the auditory assault.  The fireworks were fabulous, if short lived.  I took full advantage, snapping away the whole 5 minutes.  We sat too close to the well marked walkways, and therefore suffered a steady procession of restless attendees who apparently shared my lack of love for Broadway tunes.  However, the many members of the card carrying short-attention-span generation at least provided some lively entertainment as they wandered past.  While not a Broadway aficionado, I at least had the manners to be still for the duration of the musical segments.  For this local popular event, my whole point was to hang out with good friends and share the goings on of our lives, an all too uncommon activity these days.  A successful evening by any account.

Always Yellowstone

The park was in full bloom and the tourists were not too thick, although there were plenty. Decided to tour the Terraces in Mammoth, my old home for a year back in the day.  I had not taken the board walk tour since dragging the kids there a long time ago. I chuckled when I heard a mother ask, "it looks like we're on Mars, doesn't it?" and her son's dour response was "it looks like we're walking up lots of steps" (true).  I regularly coerced my three kids into visiting the park.  Although they would now agree those treks were a good thing, at the time, they often lacked a jubilant enthusiasm.

It is quite something recalling the look of the Terraces back in 1978 compared to now.  They look entirely different with all the constant fluctuation of the thermal activity.  Living in Yellowstone Park was a blessing which I fully appreciated at the time, knowing it was a once in a life time experience and Yellowstone has been a favorite place ever since. 

I decided to take the short walk to Tower Falls this time. I did not recall ever actually seeing it before, however I did have a vague recollection that the trail used to go to the base of the falls, confirmed by a closed trail sign with a note mentioning 1985.  The trail now goes down to the river, but you cannot see the falls from the river trail.

Going home, in any sense, is always trippy, whether it is back to your childhood hometown, or to a place when your life had a totally different complexion.  While not always disconcerting, I've found it comes with a sense of loss attached.  Though most of the lost things were better left along the trail of your life, it still evokes a feeling of detachment to something you once had attachment to.
 

So Much Beauty...So Much Pain

Our world is like a gaping wound of exposed nerve endings.  Our world is bursting all around with robust beauty and wonderment.  Those parallel tracks run through every second of each day.  Excruciating pain, injustice and unthinkable violence coupled with the deep overwhelming love for those we cherish in our home and professional lives and the joyful microseconds they bring to us each day.

More shootings in the news today, a murder suicide at UCLA, two San Francisco cops shot in a traffic stop gone bad.  And more, so many more.  You could not keep count if you wanted to; no one wants to.  And these include only stateside events.  Looking beyond our coddled American borders, the countless stories increase in horrific magnitude. 

If I didn't know better, I'd say we are all sleepwalking through some sick, tragic comedy.  There is no other explanation for the how and why of Donald Trump.  A bloviating egomaniac poised as a potential next president of the United States is beyond absurd.  But why? What feeds the mentality of a public supporting such a crass, insane megalomaniac?  There is a disconnect from reality for so many voters.  How can a man who would squash all the dreams of the poor and disadvantaged, of minorities and the paycheck to paycheck crowd, fulfill some ill conceived fantasy that he can lead a nation?  He has led several companies and a "university" of ill repute into the ground.  Why would anyone with half a brain trust him to rise above the role of a control freak boss, pointing his finger and declaring "you're fired!" on network TV?

These truly are the dark ages.  In so many ways.  I think in 100 years, history will not be kind to this era of the early 21st Century.  Assuming civilization survives the next 100 years.  I think at this point, there is serious doubt about the future of Planet Earth. 

Arches

Quick marathon one day trip to Arches National Park.  Amazing landscapes, spectacular views, a natural wonderland.